please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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