When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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