now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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