i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
