the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i carry you out of a forest
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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