Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
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I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
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I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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