Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Dude that chick in the corner just threw up

(201): View more from New Jersey

Hot

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.

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(301): View more from Maryland

I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(920): View more from Wisconsin

So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome

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(631): View more from New York

when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.

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(775): View more from Nevada

She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.

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(480): View more from Arizona

I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one

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