Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize