so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize