We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
