the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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