So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
