I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
