if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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