the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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