Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
