You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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