I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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