Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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