Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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