Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I see more hoeing in ur future
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
