I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
