i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize