Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
My dick has a subreddit
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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