So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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