my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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