I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize