So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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