i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
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Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.