I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
