he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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