i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
don't judge my taste in strippers
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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