I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize