Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize