I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize