eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
The dick lei will go down in squad history
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
