can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
vagina is talking i cant
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
