I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize