It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
