Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
