ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
he shaved USA in his pubs
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Randomize
