she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Randomize
