Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
