You smell like a Billy Joel song
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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