Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I think people are normalizing furries
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
