Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
