So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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