? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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