Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize