So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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