Your dad touched me again.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
