Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize