we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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