i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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